Correctional facility

I come prepared to bare bad news
to incite myself into a state of joy
and induce the sadness into glee
for no one knows my nightmares like me.

Awake I lay in a bed so cold
with pillows lining where you once lay
to keep me from rolling off
and hitting myself atop my head.

Is it just me? Or are there more
who wish the world would stop and go
that yesterday could be relived
redone, re-spoke, reposed.

I grow so tired of the memories
but it's the only thing that is left
only thing I have to share
only bit's of life I care to remember.

Fears

Something inside keeps reminding me of you, and I wish I could just kill it. I've tried drowning it, numbing it, forgetting it, but every time it beats from a stillness so deep it brings me to a green glowing hill where a kiss and a hug meant the world, and a random act of unmentionable kindness dared us to frolic all night.

If anyone ever reads this take a piece of advice into consideration: Don't give your heart to anyone, because they will keep it, steal it, abuse it, and throw it into a food processor to relish on your pain. It's safer to keep those things hidden, locked away. Nothing good ever comes from being open and true to someone who you aren't sure about, nothing but heart ache and eventual emotional disembowelment. It's best to keep your feelings to yourself, the wretched world will surely use it against you.

Corruption

I don't hate you,
I hate me.

I don't miss you,
I miss me.

I never dared to,
but you dared me.

I correct you,
yet I ignore me.