le meh

Who am I to you or anyone?

No one.

Sky Line

I'm a literary hobo,
jumping trains of thought.
Never staying too long
in one place, unless
something makes me do so.

Peaches

Her black hair flows over her shoulders
like the weights of time weigh upon mine.
Except her's is beautiful,
while mine is just a reminder.

A reminder of a clock counting down,
but who is to say that death itself is not beautiful
that the act of disappearing is not joyous,
only to be left in the memories of the few.

Coming up my throat I feel a snake crawling
inching it's way past my esophagus
cutting off access to lungs
and all of this is just one instant.

She waves a salute of goodbye,
never knowing when that bright smile
kind eyes and soft voice
will inundate the soft recesses of my mind

where pleasure is stored
and create a chemical reaction some have come
to call love, making me addicted to you.
I wonder how long this withdrawal will take.

How long my veins will ache
and my head will pound screaming
"more... more... more..."
with rivers flowing from those orbs

which knew and gladly accepted
the glow of your being
the curves of your body
the taste of your words.

Time stops when I'm around you
and death takes a step back.

Q

Thom York sings
through speakers.

Melancholy leaves stains
only wisdom helps to clean.

Oceans are abysmal and dark
as is the id of humanity.

Kurt Cobain liked heroin
he even fell in love with one.

Only time erodes the facade
which people use to sustain normalcy.

Chaos is a symphony.

Muzak

One thing I will always love about music is it's ability to express that which has no words.

Bleh

If I'd not said anything, it would have been counter productive.

Dancer

Dry mouth
chapped lips
fingers twitching to the beat
of base and drum
electronic arpeggios
inundate thoughts

Imagine her in her skirt
dancing to the beat
hips accentuating motion
as her body follows closely
like an enchanter
seer of visions
hair over her face
sweat pouring down her back
bare feet

The dust of the evening
seldom settles

Thinking

Tropical weather
topical anesthetics
copious and copacetic
moments washed up in the rain
as complimentary peanuts
are served with a hepi pen
contraceptive wet dreams
of triangles in obtuse realities
commence a new day
once the sun goes down.

Told

So I told her. Weight off my shoulders. Will continue on to do as I do, be myself, and interact as always. Will find out what happens. It's the best I can do for now; besides, school is so much more important right now. "I would rather be working for a pay check, than waiting to win the lottery." - Bright Eyes

Did you know???

Today I speak the truth.

Some dreams

I had this dream last night, I don't remember exactly what was going on but... someone kept telling me they "love"d me, and I couldn't muster myself up to say that I did too. It was a weird dream because it takes a lot for me to say that to someone, it's not words that are easily spoken. Much like a quote I saw this morning:

"I trust you" is a better compliment than "I love you." Because you may not always trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust.

Sometimes the universe just likes to set you up, I feel. With that dream, then that quote on G+. Anyhow, I agreed. I would rather trust someone first, and then love them. It just makes more sense. I want to trust.

Wishing on Dandelions

Dandelions are made for wishing
one thought followed by
a soft whispered kiss
from tender lips
into the wilderness of the world
and within that beautiful chaos
a white ball of seeds explodes
into a thousand pieces
each carried by the wind
hoping to find that heart
to set root in
and grow.

for now the warmth of the ethreal kiss
tender and joyous
keeps the hearth warm
during the nights they still haven't found
one another
at least  now they know
they are not alone.

Staying in bed, you sleepless insomniac.

One thing I never miss about depression is the complete and utter feeling of hopelessness attached to every facet of life. I know I must get over it, just thread through it. For some reason though, my brain keeps saying fuck all, just stay in bed, the day is going to suck and there is nothing you can do about it.

There is nothing you can do about it.

There is nothing you can do about it.

There is nothing you can do about it.

Luckily I'm a stubborn asshole, otherwise I would have stayed in bed today, and tomorrow, yesterday, all of my existence. Fuck you brain, you suck with your "feelings" and emotional baggage that always seems to pop open during these times. Next question is, just how long will this feeling last this time?