Unpublished love notes - "Her eyes bright as the morning dew."

The soft caress of the morning
eases me into the day.
I am awoken by the kiss of a lover,
the one for whom my lips have ached always.


Yet,
here she is,
a warm embrace
keeps me softly interlaced
between reality and a dream.


As I loose myself
in the aroma of her skin
my babe wraps close to me
and buries her head upon my chest,
I feel my body
begin to tingle
from head to toe
 and all along
my head becomes
light like a feather
as my consciousness
tries to escape me again.


As it does I finally wake up.


Rays of sunlight
are streaming through my window,
the mist from the moisture in the air
illuminates into a million little fractals
and dissipates the light
through out the bedroom
in the most wondrous of waves.


I look beside me, and she is gone.
I go about the small apartment,
her office is just as she left it,
nothing has been moved.
In the kitchen
her mug is in the same place I left it.


Making a cup of coffee
I hear something
coming from the living room.
After checking it out
it becomes apparent
that it's just the cat
moving about.
Her cat.

On opium for every day people

Something always told me
that time would come
when the people behind the curtain
all came out naked
and danced for the masses yet again.

Here we watch as
they dance their two step
three step
four
in order to cover up
their ass
when we come a looking
for someone to point a finger to.

Well what are you waiting for?

Crazy

Yeah, I thought you were crazy... Crazy enough to Love me.

Thralls or ecstasy

Something I can never forget
is how easy it is to do so.

Yes, forget.

It can be so easy
as long as you have the right mind
the right state
the correct directions
to amplify yourself into a noise
that no one can understand
a place to be
a niche to reach
new places to see
new people to meet.

It is all relevant
to the smile on my face
who I want to meet
who I want to see
laying naked on my bed
waiting for my one response
for them to reach out
touching my face
with hands so soft.

I want to be your holy man.

It is as it is
and it goes on
the best thing is knowing
that your eyes wished to meet mine
in a sudden burst of ecstasy
arms wrapped around each other
in the thralls of dancing
bodies mimicking
something so primal
it's only danced
in a bedroom
full of lust.

Hungry like children
we feed off one another.

That look in your eyes.

Ssica and Sour Girl

Going through this blog one may find tags of sour girl and ssica. These were two people who you may know or may have met at one point in time, whom when I met, shone a light upon my life that will be hard to forget. Ssica, a random hippie girl I met outside of NYE Phish in Miami '09 who I have come to terms with that I will never see again, and Sour Girl is one of two humanitarian workers met just around the same time as Ssica, of whom I mistakenly fell in love with when all she wanted was some peace, quiet, and fun. Sadly, such is life. These women are two forces that drive my writing at the moment, and probably will for a minute. It's hard to put a lot of these things down, and sharing them is even crazier in some sense. Though it helps me heal, and it helps me remember for future note of what humanity is, and what it is capable of. So I thought I'd just write this down to remind myself, and inform others. Also, sour girl has dissipated from my life in such a way that I may never see her again. The world can be too sweet without her around to help me remember. Miss you, you freak.

Teachings of a lemon

The life she led
made her hate
the simple things
that life had made.

It wasn't fair
to treat her kind
when all she wanted
was to be left behind.

Could it be
that her own love
couldn't be shared
because her dove
had been blown off
by a rogue bomb.

It's not so strange
to feel like this
when someone true
leaves your smile
locked away
like a memory.

If I could see her
I would still miss her
though now she's gone
and all I have
is diatribe after diatribe
telling me I'm bad

that everything done
has been in vain
that the reason she even
tried to love
was because it eased her pain
momentarily

enough for her
to get away
from all the things
that made her sway.
And so she said
to me one night

You've made it all up
and now it's time to flight.

My favorite mourning treat

This morning I woke up
and it wasn't that I felt alone
as much as I felt left out
of something greater
I just don't know what.

It wasn't like it hasn't happened before
it occurred to me once or twice
all in the past
but now this will last
until I'm out of my mind.

At least thats what the lass
who I last had in my arms
said to me once
in a car ride to a bar
that insanity settles in at 25.

Desperately Seeking Ssica

It all started simply enough. We just wanted to have a good time. By the thousands people gathered at the Miami American Airlines Arena and the lots around it. December 31 was upon us all, and we had nothing better to do but to party. Like a good lot soldier, I had my fill of mushrooms and alcohol by the time I headed towards the gate. There, I was given an extra ticket to miracle away. Thats when I first saw her. She was sitting with 3 of her friends, she jumped out at me especially, because of her dreads and eyes, a gleaming blue hue that glistens in my vision even now. She didn't want the ticket, she'd just gotten hers. I went on to give the ticket away, and on my way back I was greeted by affectionate hugs and kisses from her.

Fast Forward

I'm standing in the hallway of the busy arena with my friend who has just been accosted by someone trying to steal his ticket. Luckily, the situation was easily thwarted, and fists did not need to be thrown. I'm dancing to the sounds of the band as they make their way through out the building, everyone has a special step to their swagger tonight. I see her out of the corner of my eye, she moves to my moves. She sneaks up and kisses me again. Her lips try a second time, I hold back hoping she'll return for more.

Fast Forward

Walking through the hallways of the American Airlines Arena edifice, one feels tiny. With the hundreds of people who are making their way around it's not hard to get lost in the rumble of humanity. I make my way out to the patio with my friends wife. I bum a few cigarettes while we chat with some people. She goes back to the show, I continue on. I head to the larger pavilion where I run into a fellow dred head. There we continue our conversation from the last festival I saw him at. The band is doing well, all the kids are happy. I head back in to see more of the show.

Fast Forward

After my friend and his wife had left, my compadre Pablo Stevens and I made our way outside. Now who should be standing there but this same hippie girl. We flirt back and forth, I am hindered in thought by the boomers as well as the creep who has been hanging around her for a while. She is from Ohio, Cincinnati. Her name is "Ssica." She has 3 older brothers, who (from what she tells me) are more than aware of the life of tour. Her feet are dirty, but in a cute way. Her smile glistens as her new toothbrush falls from her bag, and the saucers in her eyes stare deep into my own. She is staring into my soul. I feel her penetrate my psychic barrier, if there ever was one, and I feel heavy hearted. In a fit of pure insanity I decide to leave.

I say good bye, and turn around. I think to myself how much I wanted a real kiss from her all along. I walk back to her, and lightly tap her on the shoulder. Ssica... She stares into my eyes again for what feels like an eternity, I lock my lips with hers. A squirming coil, lustful wonder kiss.

Fast Forward

I am in the truck, we are driving past her. I yell at her to go to the pets show. She yells at me telling me to go to the beach. I ask which one, she responds "All of them!"

Fast Rewind

It's before the Phish NYE show. Pablo and I are sitting on the tailgate and there is this dirty hippie guy with a weird rock thing, he says it takes the masses of chaotic energy, and reorganizes it into something workable. I grab it, and make a wish... I wish i could meet her, the one. My Hippie Girl.

Fast Forward

It's the day of STS9, she said she'd be here. I arrive early at the lot. It's always interesting to see the people who frequent these shows. I'm hoping to run into Ssica.

Fast Rewind

It's the 1st, I'm in the car with Steve and Darren from Particle. Sammy had me pick them up from their hotel. They seem tired and worn out. The weeks festivities seem to have taken their toll.

Fast Rewind

She tells me to go to the Particle show with her that night. I told her I couldn't, my ride was leaving.

Fast Forward

I'm talking to Steve about Ssica, and how odd the whole thing has been. He agrees that it is a strange occurrence indeed.

Fast Forward

I'm sitting in a full lot, there are hippies everywhere. Tanks are going off in the distance, and although it's been 5 hours, I'm still waiting for Ssica to show up. I run into many a friendly faces in the meantime, so it's ok. I feel like I get ripped off by a hippie momma who is just throwing some game in the lot. I still eat the tab, but I'm doubtful. It's not till later that I realize it's real.

Fast Forward

I'm standing in a dark hallway halfway through my treck into the venue of the STS9 show. My friend from the inside has come through. I make it into the show unscathed by security, who I fly a peace sign to as I pass by. My search continues once inside. No sign of her. I end up in the upstairs lounge area having a drink. Sitting down and having a smoke, a thought of her eyes, that blue ocean of majestic and infinite possibilities comes to mind. The way she smiled so freely, and flowed with the music. A Goddess, a Lover, a Kindred Spirit.

I am walking through, when someone approaches me and asks for a light. I can't help but oblige, and spark conversation. Justin as it turns out, shared my hopeless romantic ideals. He was also here in search of a girl.

Although we both were here for the same reason, let it be known that we both had very different situations though much the same. Although I was certain I had Ssicas heart, I was not sure if I could ever find her in person. When Justin had his girl in front of him, it was uncertain from his part whether or not he had her heart. He brought her across state lines, hoping that this would be the spark that they needed. Here I was, at the STS9 show Ssica said she'd be at, looking for her, hoping this is the catalyst that would initiate a change upon themselves just the same.

Fast Forward

I'm walking down the sidewalk, screaming Ssica at the top of my lungs. The alcohol and acid have taken the best of me, senses and emotions are intermingled in a cluster fuck from hell. What am I to do? I couldn't find her. I was sure she'd be here. The world is warping too fast for time to make sense. I find myself wondering through the streets and flow of the crowd. Voices intermingle, warbles of words and snorting mixed in with a hiss and coughs from the smokers. A cop is walking behind me. I catch him out of the corner of my eye as he is riding on my shadow, hoping the hippies wont notice them. I instinctively call out 6-up.

Fast Forward

He is leaning on a tree. Just getting bailed out of Dade County Jail, he seems somber as can be. It's just getting to me, he says. It's finally catching up to me, I can't believe that all of this shit happened, it's just too real... does anyone have any Ketamine? I'll take some Ketamine right fucking now. He slumps further into himself, lost in his own emptiness realizing he is helpless. Nothing can help him now, it's time to wake up and smell the roses.

Fast Forward

I type the following into my blackberry during The Heavy Pets STS9 after show:

Love, it will make you do the darnest things. Travel to the end of the world, Lands untouched by thought graced with a mere vision. Of the life, the love. here i sit, after looking all night for her, seeking Ssica. Nowhere to be found. I had to give it one try. One fucking try. It is not without a battle that I will go down. I walked these lots, in search of something so pure, so unrelenting, that nothing could stop me. Although I sit here, lost in the haze of the evening, I am aware that the unattainable can be reached. I had it, held against my lips, in a truest form of lust and wonder. Her lips. i wanted nothing but to hold her hand one more time. One kiss, one nod. She is now lost to the wilderness of the world. I am aware, yet unaware of the true reach and grasp of this IDEA. I am a lover, forever lost within the land of wondering souls. Will I ever find her? My Goddess? Where are you? Embodied in a thousand and one forms, within the minds of us all. 

I love you.

Fast Rewind

Like in the song Simple by Phish "What is a band without skyscrapers?" You know? Justin says. Like, you are the skyscraper, and you are reaching up above, beyond the normal bounds of reality. We are the skyscrapers.

Fast Forward

I'm sitting at the beach. I drove to Atlantic and A1A, parked my car, and waited for the sun to come up. There, I thought about what she'd said, about going to the beaches. It had been a while, I only live 20 minutes from it. What could her name be... Her real name... I wondered and wondered, until it came to me. Ssica is short for Jessica.

When I get home at night

When I get home at night
sometimes I look over
at the empty parking spaces
hoping
that I will see your car
and that you will be here
waiting for me to get home.

So we can talk
so we can mend
so we can forget
so we can be free
from all of the hate.

If something so wonderful
as this should pass
it would be too beautiful
and a dream that never lasts.

I wish that things were different
that you would just listen to your heart
and not the lips of others
for they spew lies
and the solemn truth is
that I love you.

It's not so difficult
to figure out
that I would fall in love
with someone like you.
You are all I've dreamed of
everything wanted in a lover
friend
partner.

Now I sit here
in my car
in my parking lot
waiting for headlights
that will never shine my way
waiting for a voice
parted lips that whisper
it's ok.

Oh woe full night
without my sour lover
how I miss her voice
her warm embrace
the smile of that girl
is all I needed
to fall in love.

Choose your poison.

Another day passes
and the masses
don't ever care
just what is going on
behind the facades
built from sport tournaments
chiseled abs
seducers
enablers
which inspire
weak minds
to all along follow
all of these mimes
which are all there to
distract the mind
with psychological opiates
keeping people dormant
enslaved
to the 5 o'clock news
same to the pills
and drugs
that humanity ingests
trying to get away
but it's only putting
a blanket over it's head
wishing
hoping
that something might change.

But no
there is no change for those who wait
there is no change for those who sit
there is no change for those who hope
there is only change in those who move
forward.

Shoulda been a comic flip book.

The way they met
was straight out of the pages
of some long lost storybook
once written by a deranged author
on a cynical night
during which they would just talk to each other
without fear of rejection or acceptance
only because they felt their own spirits
compelled to interact.




Little did they know
when he approached her
that this would be
the beginning
of the end
of a wonderful friendship
that he would miss
and she would wish
she could just dream away.




After striking conversation
without looking for a connection
they knew they had something right.
When she asked if he'd accompany her
to a rock show that night
there was no way
he could say no
to such a beautiful smile.




She drove
he relaxed
her rainbow eyes bright
their feelings intensified.
They spoke about music
they talked about life
the sickness of the world
humanity's plight.




After a night full of dance
they arrived to their place of meeting
here they stood outside of their vehicles
and smoked one last cigarette.
But as they stood there
something came over them
and they knew what it was
that which they'd been sensing all night.




They both felt something in their bones
this wasn't normal
their empyrean fires roared
and as they walked around each other
the way animals sizing one another do
their noses in the air
eyes staring everywhere
something roaring in their hearts
their synapses a blaze.
They knew it would happen again.
For now this is not
their end.

It was the first night
that sour girls' eyes would gleam.
It was the first night
that he would wish they could relive.

Happy Little Pill Head Girl

A Foreword:

I have known many people who have been "pill heads," or addicts to prescription medicine. This is not uncommon in the society where I come from, and even in my run ins with other classes it is often the well educated who also fall for this menace, since it's not "illegal." It is a monster of unimaginable girth, one which destroys and consumes without mercy. I have lost friends because of this, I have come to terms with the fact that one cannot help those who are addicts, for only they can truly help themselves. I love all of my friends, and I would never want to see them in harms way. I present to you

"Happy Little Pill Head Girl."

not blind

born with two eyes

seeing the world

experiencing reality

coming to terms with observations

applying whats' been learned in the past

Action

It must be taken

Direction

It must be planned

must not let petty things obscure judgement

not a crow

only human

able to feel emotion

easy

must not be overtaken

kind people are hard to find

many like to pretend

the sick laugh at the unknown

prying open a book of boxes

in which to place everyone in

chameleons are everywhere

don't even know where to start

cover trails of intelligence

in search of truth

that lays squandered away

hoping no one will see

pretend like it's not happening

pretend knowing nothing

makes amends

it's lies

that break and shatter

facades so well built up

so intricate

Babylon is falling down

falling down

Babylon is falling down

my dear lady.

All along

play the part of the fool

to see how far it's pushed

blood letting

bled dry

death

rebirth

awaken

A phoenix 

rises from the ashes

spreads it's wings over the plains

floating effortlessly in the sky

away from treachery

deceit

apathy

into something new

with brand new eyes

to see the world

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Where are you? I can't believe I lost youblah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah There was a time I would have cared, bit's and pieces make my memory rattle. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Can I even remember what you look like? I think I'd know if I saw you again face to face, we'd both know. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah So much white noise in my head. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Although some laugh and scorn at this, sometimes things happen for a reason. Even a godless man such as myself can see this chaos envelop people in quantum anomalys often brought together with a common goal. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah The noise makes my head ache... The noise makes my back ache... The noise... blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Theres death, rampant, everywhere... all I can say is blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah like a rattling fresh body added to the total weight amount makes up a fresh kill count like none they had seen. Words like bullets penetrated his dura matter and killed on contact. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Theres nothing that would matter much, I mean, who cares, I can just do what I want. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Love.